Life By Design Therapy

  Resilience is a desirable trait -- one that protects against depression and anxiety and helps us cope with adversity. Why not make 2021 the year that you practice building your resilience? Here are four ways to get started with becoming more resilient: ⭐️ Look back on previous successes. We can all think of at least one time when we were resilient in the past. Think back on your previous experiences with resilience. What did you do to cope? Why did it work so well? Try to replicate those successes in the face of future setbacks. ⭐️ Practice radical acceptance. Distress often comes from fighting reality or our refusal to accept the situation we are in. Radical acceptance is the act of accepting the things you cannot change and releasing control over the things outside our sphere of influence. By practicing radical acceptance, you can learn to make peace with challenging situations. ⭐️ Focus on logical problem-solving. While it's easier said than done when we are feeling overwhelme

The next love language we'll be talking about is Quality Time. This love language is all about giving your loved one your undivided attention. For someone whose love language is Quality Time , spending one-on-one time with someone they care about helps them feel loved. It's crucial that the time spent together is uninterrupted and filled with meaningful conversation. That means putting down your phone and actually making eye contact! This Valentine's Day, taking your partner on a date (sans smartphones) -- even if it's just cooking dinner at home -- will give you the opportunity to connect without distractions, helping them feel extra-appreciated. https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/marriage-counseling

  Looking back on 2020, it's become clear to us that Life by Design Therapy is unique from many other mental healthcare practices. Life by Design Therapy specializes in holistic therapy and utilizes the mind-body connection to help our clients achieve better mental health. However, what we are most proud of is our unique connection to the wider Berkeley and Richmond Bay Area communities. In 2020, we proved that we were different by: ⭐️ Starting to donate a portion of our revenue to local charitable causes ⭐️ Creating a new mental health fund to support BIPOC and LGBTQ+ clients ⭐️ Writing 24+ new blogs on different mental health topics ⭐️ Creating a free e-book on mind-body healing (which is soon to be released!) Visit our website to learn more about what makes Life by Design Therapy unique, and to schedule a free consultation with one of our providers. https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/holistic-therapy

  Next in our Five Love Languages series, we'll be talking about Gifts. This love language gets a bad reputation since it can be mistaken to mean that the person is superficial or only cares about receiving material items. However, it's important to know that for someone whose love language is Gifts, the cost of the item is never as important as the thought put into it. To someone whose love language is Gifts, having their partner buy them a coffee just the way they like it, or bring home a little trinket from a work trip, shows that they were thinking of them while they were apart. If you find these little gifts to be incredibly meaningful, then Gifts might be a way you feel and give love. For Valentine's Day, you don't need to spend a lot of money to treat someone whose love language is Gifts. Buying them a small box of their favorite chocolates or a bouquet of their favorite flowers will be much more meaningful to them than expensive, opulent gifts. From : Life by De

  There are many reasons for conflict between teens and their parents/families. Teens are starting to be more independent, they become increasingly more oriented towards their friends, and they can make impulsive decisions. For parents, there can be conflict around teens challenging adult authority and exploring their identities. All of these factors make it a common time to experience increased tension in families with teens. Today on the Life by Design Therapy blog, Dr. Nia Saunders shares her five best tips for communicating with teens and building stronger relationships as a family -- link in comments ❣️ https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/blog/5-tips-communicating-with-your-teen/1/2021

  Hygge (pronounced HOO-guh) is a Danish word describing a cozy lifestyle. As winter deepens, you'll probably be seeing more and more about hygge on your feeds -- but just what is hygge, anyways? It's important to note that while hygge is often touted as beneficial for mental wellness, it's most useful as a form of self-care. Hygge is not a treatment, or a substitute for treatment with a mental health professional. That being said, hygge includes a lot of activities recommended by mental health professionals, especially mindfulness. It's not entirely wrong to say that practicing hygge can be beneficial to your mental health. Hygge can be especially helpful as a form of grounding for trauma survivors, people who suffer from panic attacks, or others who may need to reconnect with the present moment. Hygge stresses the importance of small delights like warm blankets, fuzzy socks, hot drinks, and other tactile items that engage our senses to help us self-soothe. Whether you

With Valentine's Day quickly approaching, many of us are thinking about the ways we show our appreciation to our loved ones. As you plan to treat your partner (or yourself!) for Valentine's Day, keep in mind the ways they understand and accept love -- a.k.a. their love language. The Five Love Languages were invented by psychologist Dr. Gary Chapman. In the weeks leading up to Valentine's Day, we'll be shining a spotlight on each of these love languages to help you better understand how to express love to those around you. Remember that the Five Love Languages don't just apply to romantic love, but also to friendships, familial love, and self-love, too! Today, we'll be talking about Words of Affirmation. If your love language is Words of Affirmation, you may be a person who says "I love you" often. You find it most meaningful when someone gives you a heartfelt compliment or leaves you a note to show you they're thinking of them. To show someone who

  WE'RE HIRING! 💻 Life by Design Therapy is looking to add a licensed clinician to our team. Candidates must have a Master's degree and valid license in the state of CA, and be available to hold at least 20 sessions per week (currently via telehealth due to the COVID-19 shelter-in-place order). We are dedicated to hiring clinicians who are experienced in helping BIPOC and LGBTQIA+ clients, as well as interracial couples and families. WE PROVIDE: Competitive compensation  Semiannual Bonuses Quarterly Productivity Bonuses  Paid Sick Time 401(k) with up to 4% company matching  Annual CE Allowance Flex Spending Account (FSA)  Charitable donations supporting an organization of your choosing Supportive team environment  Comfortable and modern office space conveniently located in Downtown Berkeley and Richmond (currently telehealth) Dedication to professional development with in-house training  Opportunities for full-time employment (with health, vision, dental and life insurance be

  The recent news has been stressful and anxiety-provoking for many of us. We've experienced a collective trauma by witnessing the violence and insurrection at the Capitol. In situations like these, it's important to care for yourself. Here are four things to try to help you feel better in the aftermath of political trauma: ⭐️ Log off of social media. While it's important to stay informed, it's also critical to limit the amount of news media you consume. Logging off of social media, and getting your news only from other sources, keeps you up to date, while minimizing the amount of additional stress and anxiety you feel. ⭐️ Control what you can control. The events at the Capitol made many of us feel helpless because there was nothing we could do to stop them. In order to regain a sense of control, focus on the things you can change. This means your environment, like what you eat, what you do with your time, and how you cope with the trauma at hand. ⭐️ Look at the big pic

  "Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." 💫 Happy Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. Today, we honor the life of a great man, whose words are more salient now than ever before. Life By Design Therapy www.lifebydesigntherapy.com

  According to Google, more and more people are searching for answers about shopping addiction -- especially when it comes to online shopping. After the holidays, many of us are reviewing our expenses. For some of us, this might be an anxiety-inducing experience, as we discover that we spent more on gifts or holiday entertainment than we intended. However, the occasional overspending online is distinctly different from a shopping addiction, in which the shopper consistently feels out-of-control and powerless to stop their online shopping behavior. With COVID-19 leaving many of us bored and stuck at home, we might find ourselves turning to online shopping to cope. Online shopping can give you a rush of instant gratification than can temporarily relieve some of the feelings of uncertainty and depression that come with isolation. The problem with online shopping addiction is that the rush doesn't last, so we find ourselves needing to shop again to maintain the high. As a result, peopl

  Our mental health is closely tied to our sleep health. According to Harvard Medical School, people with mental health problems like anxiety or depression are more likely to have sleep disorders than the general population. You've probably noticed that you feel "off" after a night of bad sleep. But if you are chronically sleep-deprived, you may not even realize how deeply your lack of sleep is affecting your mood, energy, and overall health. 2021 is the year to finally establish a regular sleep routine, if you haven't already, and to begin practicing good sleep hygiene. Good sleep hygiene means: ⭐️ Waking up and going to bed at the same time every day ⭐️ Spend at least 30 minutes winding down before bed ⭐️ Unplug from electronics one hour before bedtime ⭐️ Stop consuming caffeine six hours before bedtime ⭐️ Sleep in a cool, dark, comfortable room/bed ⭐️ Get out of bed if you can't fall asleep after 20 minutes If you find that these tips are not helping you get a

  How many times have you heard someone say, “I’m so bad at reaching out!” Or maybe you have heard yourself say something like, “I just have such a hard time picking up the phone!” For so many of us, reaching out is really hard. We can be deeply hurt when we reach out, only to feel rejected. Our feelings towards reaching out may even be confusing. To learn more about "reaching out" in terms of attachment and development, and to try a brief experiment in reaching out, check out the latest blog post from Life by Design Therapy -- link in comments below ❣️ https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/blog/reflections-on-reaching-out/1/2021

  In 2021, one of the most powerful and long-lasting changes you can enact is to change the way you think about yourself. Negative self-talk holds immense power over us, including our self-confidence and our mood. Alternatively, the benefits of positive self-talk include: ⭐️ Decreased stress ⭐️ Decreased depression ⭐️ Longer lifespan ⭐️ Greater resistance to the common cold ⭐️ Better cardiovascular health ⭐️ Better coping skills As you can see, the benefits of positive self-talk are far-reaching. Positive self-talk can change both the way we feel about ourselves mentally and the way we feel physically. However, changing your self-talk is easier said than done. If you find yourself struggling to overcome negative thoughts, or to believe your positive ones, contact Life by Design Therapy -- our trained therapists can help you reframe your negative thoughts using principles of cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). (Source: Mayo Clinic) https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/krystal-williams-l

  Today, January 11, is Human Trafficking Awareness Day. Many of us assume this is an issue that does not directly affect us or happens far away from home. However, there were over 1,600 human trafficking cases in California in 2018 alone. As a trauma-informed therapy practice, Life by Design Therapy would like to highlight some of the unique mental health challenges faced by victims of human trafficking, including: ⚠️ Exposure to multiple types of complex trauma, known as polyvictimization ⚠️ Limited access to appropriate, specialized mental health services ⚠️ Difficulty developing loving, trusting relationships with others ⚠️ Cultural or linguistic barriers; isolation from their home communities ⚠️ Trauma bonding, attachment issues, and/or Stockholm Syndrome To learn more about the impact of human trafficking and to donate to efforts to fight against it here in California, visit Coalition to Abolish Slavery & Trafficking (CAST) at  castla.org . https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.co

  5 WAYS TO CARE FOR YOURSELF WHEN DEALING WITH RACIAL TRAUMA In the wake of the recent grand jury decision regarding Breonna Taylor, many are experiencing outrage and disbelief. For Black people in particular, the decision represents yet another profound loss and continued lack of justice for violence against Black women.  Our community is hurting. This pain is intensified by the backdrop of Covid-19 (which disproportionately affects BIPOC) and the protests following George Floyd’s murder, serving as another reminder that our society is also fighting other widespread social pandemics - White supremacy, anti-Black racism, and institutional oppression related to policing. Many Black people are asking each other “How do we continue showing up to work, putting on a ‘professional’ smile, and acting as if we are not grieving, as if our humanity is not constantly under threat?”  These experiences contribute to what is called racial trauma. Common responses include anxiety, depression, anger,

  A BRIEF INTRODUCTION TO THE FIVE GATES OF GRIEF by Ashley Gregory, LMFT HOW TO LEARN ABOUT DEATH  At some point as a young person, were you also absolutely fascinated by Ancient Egypt? Perhaps your sixth grade history class was also woefully uneventful before learning about mummification, hieroglyphics and golden sarcophagi (plural for sarcophagus). Honestly, what I remember most is what it meant to me to be talking about death.  At that time, I had not lost anyone close to me; there were no friends or family members I knew who had died. I did not know what to do if someone were to die. There was no guide or practice to lean on. I only knew to hope that no one close to me would die before I figured it out or someone told me. The Ancient Egyptians, on the other hand, knew how to prepare their beloved for death. Some part of me longed for direction around such a profound life event. I had so many questions -- questions that had yet to take shape in words, yet were becoming louder in my

  While you're disconnecting from social media, consider spending more time outdoors in 2021. Getting outside is a safer way to get active than going to the gym or an exercise class during COVID-19 -- not to mention, it has significant benefits for your mental health: ⭐️ According to Harvard Medical School, a 2015 study found decreased activity in the prefrontal cortex (the part of the brain associated with worrying) when participants spent 90 minutes walking in a natural setting vs. an urban one. ⭐️ The University of Minnesota reports that, among patients recovering from gallbladder surgery, those with a view of trees from their bedroom window reported less pain and spent less time in the hospital. ⭐️ According to the University of Washington, a 20-minute "dose" of nature each day has been found to significantly reduce stress levels in research participants. So, still need a goal for 2021? Science shows that spending a short amount of time outdoors (or looking outdoors f

  Despite what diet ads may tell you, the only detox you need in the New Year is a social media detox! Our second self-care resolution of 2021 is to spend time unplugging from social media. Excessive time spent on social media can be harmful to our mental health. For example: ⭐️ A 2014 study published in the journal Cyberpsychology, Behavior and Social Networking found a link between increased time spent on social media and symptoms of depression. ⭐️ According to the National Center for Health Research, studies of adolescents show that increased use of social media leads to greater "body surveillance," or self-criticism of our looks. ⭐️ As reported by the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, 20% of people feel they need to check their social media accounts often to avoid anxiety, known unofficially as "social media anxiety disorder." Luckily, research also shows that setting limits on our social media usage -- and using social media more mindfully -- can r

  Instead of creating unsustainable New Year's Resolutions this year, why not focus on strengthening your self-care routine? It's a well-known fact that taking time to engage in stress-relieving activities improves every facet of our health, from our mental wellness to our physical body. So, this week, we'll be sharing attainable "self-care resolutions" you can start in 2021 to give your mind-body health a boost. For our first self-care resolution, we suggest starting a gratitude journal. We've talked about gratitude before, but as a reminder, here's what the research says about people who take time to write down what they are grateful for: ⭐️ UC Berkeley found that people who wrote "gratitude letters" reported significantly improved mental health for 12 weeks after the study ended. ⭐️ A 2014 study from the Journal of Applied Sport Psychology found that gratitude significantly improved athletes' self-esteem. ⭐️ A 2006 study from the journal B

  Happy New Year from Life by Design Therapy ! 🎉 May you and your loved ones stay safe and healthy during your celebrations. We sincerely look forward to supporting you in achieving your goals in 2021 and beyond. https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/