Grief and Loss Therapy in Bay Area

 

A BRIEF INTRODUCTION TO THE FIVE GATES OF GRIEF

by Ashley Gregory, LMFT

HOW TO LEARN ABOUT DEATH 

At some point as a young person, were you also absolutely fascinated by Ancient Egypt? Perhaps your sixth grade history class was also woefully uneventful before learning about mummification, hieroglyphics and golden sarcophagi (plural for sarcophagus). Honestly, what I remember most is what it meant to me to be talking about death. 

At that time, I had not lost anyone close to me; there were no friends or family members I knew who had died. I did not know what to do if someone were to die. There was no guide or practice to lean on. I only knew to hope that no one close to me would die before I figured it out or someone told me. The Ancient Egyptians, on the other hand, knew how to prepare their beloved for death. Some part of me longed for direction around such a profound life event. I had so many questions -- questions that had yet to take shape in words, yet were becoming louder in my being. 

In his book The Wild Edge of Sorrow, Francis Willer introduces the “Five Gates of Grief.” When I first heard of the gates of grief, I remember feeling relieved. Finally, I thought, an invitation to grief that is open to everyone. The gates offer structure to the shared woundedness in our human experiences, pointing us to healing in ways that are both profoundly unique and exquisitely collective. As you become familiar with the Five Gates of Grief, I invite you to notice what arises in your experience and to be gentle with yourself in the process. 

https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/blog/a-brief-introduction-to-the-five-gates-of-grief/10/2020