Life By Design Therapy

  At Life By Design Therapy™, we often remind clients that vulnerability isn’t the same as exposure. True vulnerability isn’t about saying everything out loud; it’s about letting yourself be seen in safe, intentional ways. When your nervous system has learned that openness leads to hurt, it makes sense that you’d want to protect yourself. You might stay guarded, overthink your responses, or hold back emotions, not because you don’t care, but because your body learned that safety meant staying small. Practicing vulnerability starts with regulation, not risk. It’s about building small moments of trust with yourself and others so your body learns, “It’s safe to be real here.” 💛 Our latest blog explores how to rebuild emotional safety and reconnect through vulnerability, even when it feels uncomfortable. Read it now at Holistic and Somatic Therapy | Berkeley & Online Follow for more therapist insights on connection, safety, and healing. https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/

  How Vulnerability Can Bring You and Your Partner Closer It’s a quiet evening, and you and your partner are sitting side by side. Maybe there’s something you’ve been wanting to say…something small, but real. You start to open your mouth… and then pause. The words get caught somewhere between your chest and your throat. You tell yourself it’s not the right time. You scroll your phone. You change the subject. You pretend you’re fine. You’re not necessarily avoiding the conversation; you’re actually avoiding the feeling. That uncomfortable flutter in your chest, the lump in your throat, the what-if that says: What if they don’t get it? What if what I say pushes them away? That’s what vulnerability feels like, the tension between wanting to be seen and wanting to be safe. If this sounds like you, it might be time to explore what’s happening beneath that hesitation. Read More . https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/blog/how-vulnerability-can-bring-you-and-your-partner-closer

  As a practice, we often meet couples who appear to communicate well. They talk regularly, coordinate responsibilities, and stay updated on the day-to-day details of life. But even with all that communication, something essential is often missing: emotional honesty . Not honesty about logistics or facts, but honesty about the deeper experience: “I’m hurt.” “I feel disconnected.” “I’m scared we’re drifting.” When couples don’t feel safe sharing these emotions, communication becomes transactional. They’re speaking, but they aren’t truly connecting. The heart of relationship health isn’t more conversation; it’s the courage to be real , and the safety within the relationship to do so. When vulnerability becomes safe, communication shifts. Couples move from simply managing the relationship to genuinely strengthening it . 💛 In our latest blog, we explore how emotional vulnerability transforms communication into connection, and how therapy can help couples rebuild the foundation of safe...

  It’s a story we hear often. You sit down at your desk, halfway through a meeting, when it hits you, you haven’t stopped all morning. Your inbox is overflowing, your shoulders ache, and your mind keeps repeating one thought: “Just get through the day.” Sound familiar? Workplace stress has become so normalized that many people don’t notice how much it’s draining their energy and dysregulating their nervous system, until they’re completely depleted. At Life By Design Therapy ™, we see how deeply hustle culture impacts the body. Many of us long to feel calm, grounded, and purposeful, but those states are hard to access when the nervous system is stuck in survival mode. The truth is, you can’t push your way to peace. Rest, presence, and purpose aren’t rewards you earn; they’re natural states your body returns to once it feels safe enough to slow down. 🪞 Read the full blog: How to Manage Stress and Prevent Burnout in the Workplace for body-based tools to regulate your nervous system...

  If you’ve been thinking about starting therapy, this is your sign to start the year off right with support that actually feels grounding and not overwhelming. For a limited time, we’re offering $40 off each session for your first 4 months of therapy when you book a free phone consultation by 12/31 . This is our way of making therapy more accessible as you move into the new year with intention, nervous system support, and a little more ease. ✨ What this means for you: Lower cost as you begin your therapy journey Space to process the holidays, stress, or transitions Support to build routines that feel sustainable in 2026 A chance to work with a clinician who truly meets you where you are If you’ve been feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure where to begin, therapy can be a powerful first step. 📞 Book your free phone consultation, link in bio, or call 510-646-0046 Let’s get you connected with a therapist who feels like the right fit. You deserve support. 💛 https://www.lifebydesi...

  It’s a quiet evening, and you and your partner are sitting side by side. Maybe there’s something you’ve been wanting to say…something small, but real. You start to open your mouth… and then pause. The words get caught somewhere between your chest and your throat. You tell yourself it’s not the right time. You scroll your phone. You change the subject. You pretend you’re fine. You’re not necessarily avoiding the conversation; you’re actually avoiding the feeling. That uncomfortable flutter in your chest, the lump in your throat, the what-if that says: What if they don’t get it? What if it pushes them away? That’s what vulnerability feels like, the tension between wanting to be seen and wanting to be safe. If this sounds like you, it might be time to explore what’s happening beneath that hesitation. 🪞 Read the full blog — “ How Vulnerability Can Bring You and Your Partner Closer” — for practical ways to regulate your nervous system and build emotional safety in your relationships...

  How to Manage Stress and Prevent Burnout in the Workplace It started on a Wednesday. I was sitting at my desk, halfway through a meeting, when I realized I hadn’t stopped all morning. My inbox was overflowing, my shoulders ached, and my brain was locked on one thought: “Just get through the day.” Sound familiar? Workplace stress has become so normalized that many of us don’t notice how much it’s draining our energy and dysregulating our nervous system, until we’re completely depleted. While many of us desire to be okay and live with a sense of purpose and peace, it’s hard to regulate and find those moments in the midst of hustle culture. Read More https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/blog/how-to-manage-stress-and-prevent-burnout-in-the-workplace

  One day, you’ll realize your body was never against you. It was protecting you. That shutdown, the overthinking, the need to control, the emotional numbness…they aren’t flaws in your personality; they’re your nervous system’s way of saying, “I don’t feel safe.” When you’ve experienced trauma or chronic stress , your brain learns to prioritize survival over connection. So you might find yourself withdrawing when things get too close, getting angry when you actually feel scared, or staying “busy” because slowing down feels unsafe. This is your body doing its best with the information it has. Healing begins when you stop fighting those patterns and start understanding them. Because the moment your system feels safe, it no longer needs to protect you in the same way. Your body isn’t the problem; it’s the guide. 🌿 Follow for more nervous system–based insights and gentle reminders — and save this for the days you feel frustrated with yourself. 💛 https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/...

  At Life By Design Therapy ™, we often hear from clients who feel completely drained, but can’t just walk away from their jobs. The truth is, burnout doesn’t always mean you need a new career. Sometimes, it means your body and nervous system need new ways to feel supported. Chronic stress keeps your system stuck in survival mode, constantly alert, always “on.” Over time, that leaves you feeling detached, unmotivated, or emotionally exhausted. Preventing burnout isn’t about doing less ; it’s about doing things differently. Small, intentional shifts like nervous system breaks, emotional boundaries, and restoring body-based regulation can make all the difference. 💛 Read our latest blog for more therapist-approved tips on burnout recovery — link in bio. 💛 And follow for more insights on nervous system regulation and holistic healing. https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/

  No one tells you that healing isn’t just about feeling better, it’s about feeling everything and moving through it safely. When your body starts to feel safe again, it finally has permission to release what it’s been holding: grief, tension, memories, and unmet needs. That release can look like fatigue, tears, or even irritability. It’s not a setback; it’s your nervous system learning how to regulate. Somatic and holistic therapy support this process by helping you stay connected to your body instead of fighting it. Because healing isn’t about pushing through, it’s about learning to move with your system, not against it. If you’re ready to start therapy, let’s begin your healing journey together. Book a call through the link in my bio! https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/therapy-phone-consultation

  Teens today are navigating more pressure than ever…school expectations, social media, friendships, and constant stimulation from a world that rarely slows down. It’s no wonder so many teens are feeling anxious, disconnected, or exhausted. Their nervous systems are working overtime to keep up. As a parent, you can’t remove every source of stress, but you can help your teen feel safe, supported, and seen. 🌿 Here are a few therapist-approved ways to start: ✨ Slow down before big events — help your teen take a few deep breaths. ✨ Create space beyond screens — connection happens offline, too. ✨ Celebrate small wins — effort matters more than perfection. Every small moment of support helps regulate your teen’s body and strengthen their sense of self. 💛 Learn more in our latest blog: 10 Ways to Support Your Teen’s Mental Health — link in bio. https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/blog/10-ways-to-support-your-teens-mental-health

  Many people grow up believing that safety in relationships comes from keeping the peace by saying the right things, avoiding conflict, staying calm, and being agreeable. But in our work with clients, we often see that the moments of deepest connection aren’t the ones where everything feels easy. They’re the moments of honesty, when someone shares what’s true, even when it feels uncomfortable or risky. That’s when relationships begin to feel more authentic. So many of us spend our lives protecting ourselves from being seen, hiding what feels messy, fearing that if we’re fully known, we’ll lose the connection we want most. Yet, again and again, we see the opposite happen. When someone is brave enough to be vulnerable and says something like, ‘I felt hurt when…’ or ‘I’m scared we’re drifting apart,’ something shifts. In an emotionally safe relationship, their nervous system can begin to relax, and the connection naturally softens. That moment of truth becomes a bridge back to safety...

  For those who celebrate today, Happy Thanksgiving from Life by Design Therapy ! We encourage you to use this time to engage with your loved ones, create a space of gratitude, and honor the Indigenous as this day could be a reminder of what they have endured. https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/

  In therapy , we often hear people say, “I want to be honest, but every time I try, it turns into a fight.” It’s natural to hesitate before sharing what’s real, especially when honesty feels like it might risk the closeness you’ve worked so hard to protect. But honesty doesn’t have to be loud or harsh. Sometimes it’s quiet, intentional, and rooted in care. In our work with couples, we’ve seen that honesty begins long before the words come out. It starts with awareness by noticing what’s happening in your body, pausing before reacting, and asking yourself, “What am I really trying to say?” When you can stay grounded and present, honesty becomes less about being right and more about being real. That’s where the connection begins to grow. Here are a few small ways to start: 🌿 Start small — You don’t need to begin with the deepest wound. Start with a small worry, disappointment, or appreciation. Safety builds in layers. 🌿 Name what’s happening in your body — Try saying, “This feel...

  November is Native American Heritage Month! 🍂 This month, we honor the strength, wisdom, and enduring spirit of Native American communities. It’s a time to slow down, listen, and learn; to reflect on the histories that have shaped this land and the stories that continue to live through art, music, and tradition. One way to honor this month is by investing time in education and connection. Learn about the true history of Native peoples, support Native-owned businesses and artists, and engage with local community events. At Life By Design Therapy ™, we believe healing happens through understanding and connection, both with ourselves and with the communities that surround us. ✨ Take time this month to honor, learn, and celebrate. https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/

  I recently realized I had lost the ability to be still. Waiting for the coffee to brew? I’d scroll my phone. Walking to the car? I’d put on a YouTube video. Five minutes before a meeting? I’d squeeze in emails. Every corner of my day got filled with something, some kind of noise, some kind of input. At first, I thought this was a good thing. I was being efficient, right? Maximizing every spare moment. But beneath the surface, it felt different. I started noticing a strange unease. Everything on my list felt urgent, but none of it felt meaningful. Read More https://www.lifebydesigntherapy.com/blog/5-simple-transitions-that-will-change-how-you-move-through-your-day